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Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! Fuck Tesco! 

Tesco Ireland have branches at:

Artane Castle, Clearwater,  Prussia Street, Rathfarnham, Rathmines, Sandymount, Santry, Stillorgan, Tallaght, Baggot St. Lr., Baggot St. Upr. and Balbriggan.. And lots of other places.. Try these at your local one!!
 

Tesco has also run trade units in  Poland, the Czech Republic, Slovakia, Hungary, Thailand, Korea and Taiwan. Workers the world over are being screwed by them, lets stop Tesco today!!

20  Things to do at your local Tesco while with your spouse/shopping partner/significant other:

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms, randomly put them in peoples trolleys when they aren't looking.
 
2. Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
 
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the bathrooms.
 
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3 in house wares,'...and see
what happens.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. Or even better just take it away, if someone gets hurt, Tesco get sued!!!
 
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring
pillows from the bedding department
 
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?
 
8. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
 
9. While handling knives in the house wares department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Also good, try buying loads of pain-killers and a bottle of whisky, if they refuse to sell to you begin to cry. 
 
10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'.
 
11. In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
 
12. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say 'PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!!'
 
13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker assume the foetal position and scream 'NO! NO! It's those voices again'.

14. Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly...........'Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here!'

15. Scream really loudly about having seen a rat in the butchers.

16. Turn up five minutes before closing and do a full weeks shopping, refuse to leave until finished!

17. Dressed in pyjamas and slippers go wandering around your local 24 hour Tesco eating from a packet of corn pops or other  breakfast cereal...

18. Walk around roaring into your mobile phone about what a dump you think Tesco is, and how you can't wait to get out..

19. Get a big group of you'se and have an egg fight at the checkouts.

20.  Run about the shop screaming a mad panic and letting off all the fire alarms!!!

For Tesco Employees!!

Ways to stop the bastards making another billion in profits!

Careful; some of these things you could do that could  get you into real trouble:

• Punch, kick, bite, stab or shoot some, or all of the managers.
• Fire bomb the place.
• Turn up for work there drunk and puke on a customer/ manager.
• Lock the managers in the big walk in freezers. Leave till they go quiet!
• Throw a manager in baler.
• While drinking a bottle of stolen whisky drive the forklift through shop at 3p.m on Saturday afternoon sending customers scattering like skittles!!!
• Shit on managers desk.
• Steal managers car and crash it
• Destroy stock... Oops I dropped it!!
• Talk loudly about having seen rats in store room around customers.
• Refuse to shave if asked.. even if you want too, just to annoy them.
• Tell the customers to fuck off.
• Tell the managers to fuck off.
• Organize a strike.
• Demand your right to wear a skirt... In England two Tesco employees took a case against Tesco for the right to wear earrings, they won, now Tesco must offer all male employees the choice of a woman's uniform.. TAKE IT!!
• Find out where the manager's live,  send them a letter or two..
• Release animals in the store. 
• Sit on the eggs.. Say you wanna hatch them..
• Empty as many tills as you can of all cash, then disappear forever.. Find a nice Spanish hideaway..
• Poison managers food..
• 'Accidentally' ram the customers with trolleys, their cars too..
• Sing anti Tesco songs in the canteen and while working.. See here for examples.
• Just quit, ideally in a big group just before a stock take...

If you have a Tesco story you would like to see appear on this site please email me with it by clicking here.

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